privy to what
I haven't stayed at my apartment since the driver rear window of my car was broken into last Monday. I have been home, but just to satisfy my OCD and make sure the door remained locked. It's an awkward feeling going to my apartment building, because since someone violated me, I feel like an outcast, like I don't belong there. But truthfully, in staying with my sister, I realized that I didn't belong with her either. They say home is where the heart is, but I felt nothing being there with my sister except anxiety. Afraid to touch anything without her permission, to eat, to do anything. I felt very unwelcome. I love my sister with everything, I do, but we will always be two different species from two different walks of life. Dasssss it.Things are going well with Jose, but he has a situation that I have to be mindful of and patient with so I'm forcing myself to be less needy. He alerted me to the situation off the muscle, so I can't say that I didn't know. I do know, so my failure to cooperate or understand won't be appreciated. I knew what I was getting myself into. But that doesn't make it any less irritating.
written on 08/27/2014 at 11:30 A.M.
-