When anger escapes, it's because the walls shielding it has exceeded it's capacity. I have an almost 6 month old baby and I'm in a relationship with one of the most hard to understand men I've ever dealt with. But that's just it, I have a habit of picking men that are very hard to deal with. My choice of men never varies. It's always the hard-ups, the street thugs, or the runners... fear of committing. It's hard to be in these kinds of relationships because they take so much energy to maintain. Always have to observe, but never speak. Always waiting for the breakthrough. It's a lot of work to upkeep and to be honest, I don't know where I have all the energy to keep doing it.
I'm on my couch, butt naked. I haven't used my laptop in months due to my handy dandy phone, and the inspiration to write hasn't existed for quite some time. Until today. Man, I have never seen a man more uncomfortable with the idea of going to a wedding. We talked about it for at least a month, and he said OK to being my guest along with our daughter. Now, I am dateless all because I let my anger get the best of me. But see how he did that? Made me blame myself for his inability to be honest? He could have just said no. But now I get to show up, with my kid, and like the single person I really am.
12:25 P.M. - 07/02/2016