Headches & Migraines

I've been avoiding the task of writing a detailed post because I just didn't want to write and simultaneously read another post about how I can't get it right with men. But, in an effort to document that failure that is my so-called life, I might as well write. Someday I might just look back at this and laugh, or cry. Really hard.

I blew this whistle on "That Weird Thing" and JR. Both equally angry with me. The funny thing is that I don't really care and I don't feel bad that I pissed them off at all. They weren't of very much use to me anyway. JR just smoked a hell of a lot of green and always had his hands on it, meanwhile "That Weird Thing" was down for whatever. He'd do whatever I asked. Their flaws are minimal, but huge enough to displace them due to where I am mentally right now. They both are seeking more time than I want to give or have at all for myself. No, I'm sorry that's not happening. Maintain a relationship? That's just more shit I already don't have the energy for.

I can sit here and tell you all day what I want but the truth is, my desires are probably far from what I need. And there's a difference in the two. I am unbalanced so I cannot tend to these issues as tactfully as I'd like to. So we're back to square one and quite possibly at the end of both ropes... so there goes two more long gone.

In the meantime I have stopped any type of promiscuous behavior. I haven't slept with anyone or engaged in any mouth related activity. I pretty much have been staying Madonna's version of immaculate. That's a plus but how do I work my way around to getting to someone that I want to get close to? I'd like more than just the D and a headache for a change.

written on 05/20/2014 at 3:09 P.M.
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