Life's jokes
I have no words. I tried to write three times and nothing of substance came to mind. Maybe because I give up trying to decipher shit. Yep, that's it. I give up.Yesterday my dad texted me and told me that I needed to go see my great-grandmother because things were just getting worse for her. Today, my grandmother called and validated that in tears. So the next thing on my "must be done" list is to go see great grammy after work. I hope and pray that they are wrong about this being it for her. I am not a fan of death and I haven't yet come to terms yet with the fact that it is the inevitable end. For you, you, her, him. Me. This is nothing I want to willingly deal with right now and the day hasn't even ended.
I went to see the leasing agent to hand in my application for the apartment. Before that I got a text from Lugo asking when I was coming (coming to get him). I waited to answer since I didn't know what the verdict would be in regards to the apartment. I texted him back when I got back to work saying I'd hope to probably come get him by Tuesday or Wednesday. Minutes later, Jane sends me an email and asks me, "Does Lugo have more than one number?" Me thinking innocently I told her I forgot to give her his new number since I changed it, she responded back, "No, I got a text from him from a 646 #" I was confused. Neither his mom nor brother have a regular NY CITY cell phone number so I asked her to show me me the text. All it said was, "hi." But low and behold he sent her a follow-up text this morning saying, "Sorry this is Lugo, M's friend and that was me that texted you from the 646 # yesterday. I got your number mixed up with someone else's." Er, Right. I took the number down and called it privately at my desk phone. It was P. His drug addict ex, or maybe not so ex at this point. I do love Lugo, but I agreed to be his friend and so I can't be mad that he's hanging around P. But I have my opinion about this girl and I don't like where this is going. So that ensues questions. I texted him and asked him if he's even in PA and he responded back, "Ugh, hold on." Which only leads me to believe he's going to concoct some lie to tell me. What's worse is that I feel so numb I don't even think I'm hurt.
Bottom line though is that I asked for this. That's right M, take accountability. You asked for this.
Not only am I alienated from my immediate family, but my so-called best friend Lugo is neglecting to be truthful with me. I don't know what the hell is going on and I'm starting to think that God finds all of this to be some kind of comedy. I don't get it anymore. Now I really want to know what I did to deserve this.
written on 02/07/2014 at 3:38 P.M.
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